Know your goal = Why are you in this conversation?
You can have both productive and unproductive conversations on purpose. For example, if your goal is to hang out, it may not be traditionally productive — but it is productive for that purpose. What matters is knowing why you’re in the conversation to begin with.
In an argument, it’s easy to get swept up in emotion and forget your original goal. That doesn’t just waste time, it can actively work against what you set out to achieve, making the conversation doubly counterproductive. The key is recognizing the moment you’ve lost sight of your goal. That’s when you can reset and reverse course.
With people you like, it’s just as easy to lose track of your goal and enjoy the moment. But if that wasn’t the plan, it might come at the cost of an unresolved issue. This happens often in good, cooperative teams — they enjoy talking, so meetings stretch out, and the original goal gets lost.
Know your goal, and follow it.