You’ve done a lot. Finished what others quit, handled what seemed unmanageable, shipped projects, survived hard years, built things you’re proud of. Then someone criticizes you, and in a moment, you find yourself wondering whether maybe you’re not good enough. Where did the confidence go?
Confidence is often presented as something that comes from achievements. And it does, partially. But if it’s only about achievements, the moment they are challenged, confidence starts to vanish. The same happens when there are no significant achievements for a period of time.
If criticism sends you looking for proof that you’re good, your confidence isn’t standing on its own yet.
I think that true confidence comes from the feeling that you’re going to be OK no matter what happens.
You’ve failed before and kept going. You’ve been rejected and survived. Each time, you build more confidence that you’ll be OK again.
“I will be OK.” This is the confidence that stays.